Another example of: Its SO Frustrating: Time and Inspiration

I have little time to write and develop my “voice.” Yet I seem to have lot's of time to myself when I am doing the delivery thing. One might think that I could develop stories and other things to write. I do, actually. Yet when I get home, those well formed thoughts and complete story lines are gone, like the fuel I burned all day long.

Take tonight for example, The Runtyun is at her friends and I have the time to spent on writing this story that I was working on before the computer smashed-up. Truth is, during the past few days I have sat down here trying to get the thread going again---and made no progress. Something seems to always get in the way.

Well, the good news is I am here doing something instead of just sitting watching T.V. My biggest excuse for not writing when the kid is not here goes kinda like... “She is not here and now I can watch what I want to.” That combined with, “It was a shit day and I deserve to relax for a bit,”seem to drain my creative processes.

Its SO Frustrating!!!

I need to learn how to channel my writing and find a way to use the good ideas I get during the day and put them here.

olc

Lament

I have had delusions of grandeur for the last few years. Truth is I really don’t want to work for someone else, I want to write for a living. I think I have interesting ideas and I have deluded myself into thinking that others may be interested in them.

Seems I am wrong in that assumption.

When I post on any of my blogs; A Daddy Grows Up: A Chronicle of Our Journey, Rants and Brain Echoes, My Rantings (a journal of thoughts), or even just update my status on Facebook, I get a smattering of views and almost no comments. Much less any follows.

I spend a good amount of time writing these posts and most of the them are pertinent to something going on outside of this electronic box. I always want to have feed back from my readers and most of the time ask for it in the post. Yet I get very little. I want feed back on the content and style, yet all I get is encouragement with no editorial rebuttal.

I’ll keep on trudging along writing here and working on my fictional writing too, but it sure would be nice to get some followers and comments, so please read and let me know what you think. I even want to know if you, the reader, will never look at a posting of mine again. Just let me know and maybe an indication on better writing, or more interesting topics, anything that could help me in rise to journalistic sufficiency. 

Thanks, olc 

I wanna use my video recordings to protect myself from official abuses!

O.K., a legal question or two, for those out there that know more than me. I have some one in mind, he has helped me in the past, but any one who has an idea please chime in!

When being detained at a roadside checkpoint, do I have the right to record video of the event?

Also, lately I have been seeing signs at police stations saying that recording of any sort are not permitted. Is this permitted, or do I have a Constitutional right here?

olc

New post on a good blog

I just posted on my blog A Daddy Grows up. http://adaddygrowsup.blogspot.com/  Have a look and let me know what you think.

Lost and Wondering

Yesterday I wanted to get lost and find a new place or two. I may have done just that.

There is this place called The Light Center on the way from Black Mountain to Chimney Rock on NC Hwy. 9. I have heard about it and wondered what it was all about. When I first saw the signs, years ago, I thought it was a place to buy lamps. O silly me! Then a friend let me know a little more about it. He was a county sheriff and found some reason to go up there and see what it was all about.

So I looked the place up on google and learned enough about it to want to see for myself. That was a year ago and I never seemed to have an opportunity to go there. I was even told by some one, whom I am enthralled with, that I was not in a place to experience its potential. Today was the day though.

As usual The Grinner started its low rumbling with a roar. I felt the power the engine exudes. It vibrated. The head light bounced. The Grinner shivered in anticipation. 

While I let it stand and warm. I got my helmet and stuff together. After a few minutes I cut the choke and listened to the beast fall back to sleep. The idle is too slow, so I played with it for a minute. 

Finally it was time to go. The part of the Blue Ridge Parkway I was going through is nicely wooded having bunch of paths one can follow to pleasant little walks, but for the most part, it is used as a way to get from here-to-there.

It is always a pleasure to ride it though, it many curves both smooth and predictable. I finally made it to Charlotte Highway and got gas. After that I was looking for Old Fort Road. This road is fun to ride, with lots of twists and turns, fields to ponder over and cars to keep one slow enough to enjoy it all.

My plan for this ride was to find the Light Center and see what they have to offer and then go on to get lost, not really lost but explore an unknown road which I have wanted to ride ( I heard there was a nice swimming hole perfect for a daughter and her dad).

                                       

It turns out this place is interesting. The acreage it uses has a tranquil feel with a slight breeze taking some of the heat out of the air. Some places in our world seem to have an aura exuding calm and this is one. I have experienced another called Dogtown in Gloucester, Ma. However, that is another tale.

I was met by a very pleasant lady, who was not intimidated by the bike, who handed me an information packet and offered me a chakra cleansing light show of some kind.

I looked at their library/shop of books and literature and saw a plentitude of material on alternative Christian worshipping. They also had some books on chakras. An interesting combination, I thought.

I walked a path to a little pond and heard frogs croaking and birds singing. It was refreshing and I began to feel some tension unwind, though my leg was not too happy to be walking so far.

I resolved to go back and take the time to try their chakra cleansing sensory room soon. I think I’ll go once and see how it feels, then go back after doing a little cogitating on chakras to see if I can perceive any difference. (I like when I use big words)

                                        

Drag pipes, like the ones on The Grinner, tend to be rather loud, but if I am careful I can make the rumble a little less obtrusive. I rolled out of there looking for my road to get lost on. Unfortunately, I fell behind a caravan of hay toting pick-ups. They were going really slowly and on this part of the road it’s a challenge passing anything. Now of course my friends on sport bikes may have another opinion, and during another ride I may have the same one. I bided my time and found a short straight to get around those working guys.

I settled into my pace looking for the turn out to the road and second goal of the day. While riding and contemplating the my experience wondering about the Light Center. I did not feel any profound enlightenment, merely curiosity. I will go back there, they have a number of workshops and other gathering events and the chakra cleansing room interests me a little. Now the scratch has been itched though, and there are some residual curiosities.

Finally my mystery road came up to me. It was closed so I could not get lost today. O well. 

I rode on to Lake Lure, had some lunch. I reached out to a friend, but she was working. Finally it was time for me to go home.

The ride home was typical, cars going too slow, yet giving me a chance to enjoy the world around me, so it was not so bad. 

                                        

                                                  

I am not sure what I expected from this ride, nothing profound happened though. I am simply a little more curious about a new place to explore. Of course, any time I get to riding is good. 

olc

It’s SO frustrating---Life

Back in the day, when life really was not so good, I tried to be a peddler. You know some one who sold trinkets to fools on the street. They told us it was not about the products we were selling(junk, btw), but the deal we were offering. While others, more experienced and successful, went by the idea that one sold one’s self. This train of thinking made the assertion that the person making the deal was the “all important factor, not the trinket, nor the the “deal.” One sold one self. Those who could make it happen on that level did very well. Me, not so much.

At this point in my life, I still have the same dilemma. I cannot seem to sell myself very well.

It’s SO frustrating

There is this person, very important to my family, who seems to be scared of me, or at the very least very leery of my motivations. I am not sure what I did to create this antagonism, but it is there and very real.

So now it is the time for me to sell my self. I just don’t know how to assert my self and be recognized as me and not the person she thinks I am. 

Or maybe it just goes back to the fact that people just do not like me.

Another example of: Its SO Frustrating.

It’s SO frustrating---Pandora

Back when Pandora, the free music streaming site, started, it was all free and no commercials. As I remember it was a site designed to track the listening habits of users. Then they discovered that maybe they could make some cash if they used some paste-on advertising. That was ok, if a little alarming. 

It’s SO frustrating

Now you cannot go twenty minutes without having a radio commercial disrupt listening!

P.S. How do you go from Pink Floyd - Marooned - The Division Bell to Lynyrd Skynyrd-Free bird. When Lynard Skynyrd is not even a part of the playlist?!

olc